I am done Nursing School, Wow.

IMG_7174Wow. It’s been almost a year since the last time I wrote on this blog. That is insane. First off, I really am sorry for just leaving the blog behind. As you can see, although nursing school kicked my butt, I kicked it right back and graduated.

I am finally done.

All that hard work

Just like that

I am finished.

It’s crazy because I sit here and look back and I can still remember exactly how I felt going into my first nursing class, 8 weeks pregnant, not knowing what to do. I can still feel the pain of having to take a semester off because I was due at a time where it was impossible for me to just give birth and go right back four days later. I can still feel the tears and the sadness when I had to go back when Eli was about six months.

I was not emotionally ready.

Mentally, I was unstable.

But I had to do it, and I did it. I graduated and I did that.

Okay, yeah I didn’t graduate with honors (though I was literally so close, darn you 3.48 lol) and that is okay.

Words cannot even express how proud I am of myself. I’m not one to brag, but man this was such a big accomplishment. The journey felt so long and just like that it’s done. I remember being so annoyed because my first rotation was in a nursing home and it was so far from us, so once a week, Fitz and I would have to wake up around 4:30 in the morning, try not to wake Eli up as we transferred him from the bed to the car seat, and leave the house by 5:30 so I could make in time for Clinical by 6:30 and Fitz would make it to work by 8.

I remember having to lock the doors so I wouldn’t be tempted to go down to play with Eli because I had some major studying to do. I remember feeling anxious every first day of clinical, crying because I didn’t have time to study, panicking because I forgot to study one part of the blueprint, and going crazy because my brain would continuously tell me I’m not good enough.

But I did it.

I did the one thing I thought I wouldn’t be able to do the second Eli was born. I thought, “I’m not good enough to do this. I’m not smart enough. I am not capable”. But the thing is,  one thing I learned during this journey is the importance of knowing that anything is possible. I don’t want to sound cliche, but it is true. When you put your mind into something and really prioritize and claim that you will get it done, it’ll happen. It’ll take time, but it’ll happen. Another thing I need to point out is that I would not be able to accomplish what I accomplished without the help and support from everyone that stood by me throughout this journey. It is okay to rely on and ask people for help. Until now, I still have a hard time doing because that’s just how I am, but this would not be possible without everyone that supported me and motivated me.

With that being said,

This is all for nothing if I do not pass the NCLEX, lol, jk, but partially true so please pray for me that I do.

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Unexpected Interview

Hi, hello.
I know it’s been quite a while since I last posted. Maybe a couple of weeks. Tonight is my last night of Spring break, so tomorrow I go back to school. Before Spring break started I told myself I’d do so much school work during spring break. WELP, that did not happen at all. I don’t regret it. Literally the weeks before Spring break killed me. We had an exam every week and careplans due every week and it was just so annoying and crazy and stressed me out. It definitely did make the days go by so fast though.
Anyway, I’ve always had mixed feelings about applying for externships. There is a part of me that really wants to so I can gain more experience and to help me not get so nervous anymore. The other part of me wants to just chill with Eli during the whole summer and do different types of activities. I decided to apply for some anyway and one called me back last week.
This was so unexpected because I really personally believed that my resume/cover letter sucked. They called me on a Thursday asking me to come in for an interview Monday, which is the monday that just passed.
The interview went okay. I just hate this feeling that I have. I feel like I did horrible and made a fool out of myself. Also I don’t know what I want. A part of me really wants to get this position and another part of me is scared and… very unsure and wouldn’t care less if I didn’t. I was just very focused on spending the whole summer with Eli, at the same time gaining experience and money wouldn’t hurt.
I am definitely praying about it though. I know I should stay confident, but there is a part of me that feels like I am not going to get it.

Pharmacology Tip!

If you know me well, I LITERALLY HATE PHARM. Last semester was my very first semester taking Pharm. While others found it extremely easy and easier than medsurg, it was the opposite for me. Pharm was actually my lowest grade last semester. I don’t know why I had such a hard time with it? I felt like it was just so much to remember and studying for it always made me anxious. I just kept mixing some drugs with others and not just the drugs, but their side effects as well.

During our second Exam, three good friends of mine who saved my butt (Marcel, Lauren, and Lilly if ya’ll are reading this lol), were kind enough to send me charts that they made. My first Pharm exam was my lowest, I think I got like an 84? By the second exam, when I used the charts they sent me, my grade really went up. The charts helped me kind of frame it in my head and helped me organize it in my head as well. Pharm is a lot of memorization and of course, you have to learn how to understand the drugs too. The charts helped me memorize them and gave me time to really understand how they all work together. For my second exam, I don’t even remember what I got, I’m pretty sure it was like a 90 or 94? or Maybe 92 Idk, the point is, the charts really helped me and now this semester, I’m making my own chart.

If you guys wanna see how I make them, a preview is above. I use word document and honestly don’t know where I’d be without it. The word program that comes with MAC sucks. I mean you could always use google docs but you need the internet. At least with word I can literally make charts anywhere because you don’t need internet connection for it.

I started making a chart already for the first exam. So what I do is I make a table and separate them by drug and their acton, side effects, adverse affects, patient teaching, what to do before and after you administer the drug (since that’s how our new book is outlined), and nursing consideration. Also, reading the book while making this chart really helps me remember them! I also insert comments on the side and the ones shown probably won’t make sense to you, but when I look at them, I just get it. I also noticed if you insert comments on the side and you print the document, it gives you a little space to write some stuff too when you’re actually studying.

Obviously you guys don’t have to do this to get an A or better grades. If you’re already doing something that helps you out and that works for you, then that’s great. This is just something that helps me really focus and believe it or not, it makes studying a lot more fun cause it’s so organized and pretty lol.

Oh I forgot to say, they made us get a new book this semester and it is so much easier to comprehend so I have a good feeling about this.

 

 

 

Sorry for being inactive

Hey everyone,

So school has started. I apologize for not writing here for a while, lol like two weeks, idk. School started last week (January 8th) and i don’t know why Holy Family likes to make us struggle and make us come in earlier than other schools when we don’t get out earlier either. But anyway, school started and it’s definitely a lot harder than last semester I would say. Last semester, the first two weeks, I was still able to surf the web, watch some netflix, spend time with Eli without having to worry about being behind, BUT MAN THIS SEMESTER, EVEN THE FIRST FREAKING DAY I ALREADY FELT LIKE I WAS MONTHS BEHIND AND I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW THAT WAS POSSIBLE? Not to mention, we have like 30 something people in our class and they all freaking intimidate me because they all seem so smart and knowledgeable like they read the book every night, which is probably something I should do. They mostly participate and I’m just sitting there listening to what they’re saying out loud or shouting out loud and I have no clue, whatsoever, what they’re saying. Like did we learn this before? I don’t know. Honestly, just the first two weeks of school made me feel super stupid. I used to come to class semi prepared with knowledge about what the lecture is going to be about, but now my mind is like blank and all I’m thinking in my head is “Okay Trish, this is the semester that you’re going to fail” but I cannot think like that. I want to keep my record of not getting anything below an 80 my whole entire nursing school career, and while that may seem impossible, it’s actually pretty doable with a lot of work and determination. I mean I did it last sem, I should be able to do it again, but then again, this semester is harder.

Also did I mention that we have two clinical days now and I am kind of freaking out because I’ve never really had experience in the hospital, except for that time I was in the nursing program in my community college but had to drop out because I was severely depressed and couldn’t handle anything. Yeah, I had clinicals while I was in that program and I remember crying all the time, so I don’t know how I am going to handle this semester… with TWO DAYS. Thankfully my friends are in my clinical group and other people that seem so sweet, on the plus side my clinical instructor seems nice, ON EMAILS, but hopefully she’s nice in real life too, lol.

Well, wish me luck this semester. We’re learning about the heart now so that’s great. I hate the heart.